First, I thought I'd like to share a few funny quotes. As a writer, I'm all about quotes.
The first is from the movie The Lost Boys. The last line in the movie, it comes from the grandfather, and it painted the rest of the film in a whole new light for me.
"One thing about living in Santa Carla I never could stomach, all the damn vampires."
This is something worth mentioning before your daughter and grandchildren come to stay with you, but then again, if you have a mild rat infestation, you might not say anything. Maybe it really was nothing more than a nuisance.
It's always nice when people can be honest about themselves, even writers. We aren't all ego maniacs, though I'm not sure which category I fall into yet.
"I am the literary equivalent of a Big Mac and fries" -Stephen King (he's still making lots of money, so there's no need to complain, at least)
Now, here's a quote from a man who was a wonderful writer, and it may be funny to writers. Personally I find it funny and disconcertingly true.
"Writing is easy. You only need to stare at a blank paper until your forehead bleeds." -Douglas Adams
Now, here is one that is funny, but also exemplifies how politicians do their jobs.
"Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please." -Mark Twain
In all fairness, politics is often funny even when it doesn't intend to be. Comedians often just point out what was already funny to begin with. This clip from The Daily Show is no different. No matter what your political or personal views about same-sex marriage are, Jon Stewart makes some good points in this clip.