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It's time to delve back into RC's complicated world. For those who've missed prior installments of this serial, you can find it all on this PAGE.
Memoirs From the End of the World
Entry #36
RC sat alone on the cold concrete
floor. The darkness swallowed her whole,
and she it allowed her to pretend
that no one else existed. The nausea had
persisted all day, but she did her best to hide it. She didn’t want to voice her fears, because
silly as her reasoning was, she didn’t want to make it real by speaking those
fateful words.
If she spoke them, the others would know
what happened to her. They would know
what Leo did as she carried as she carried the constant reminder with her.
Even as she had these thoughts, she also
experienced some guilt. If she was in
fact pregnant, she couldn’t blame the child growing inside her for what
happened.
Of course, if it were true, one fact was
indisputable in her mind. She couldn’t
let the overlords get their hands on her or her baby. If they did . . . This certainly wasn’t the kind of world in
which she’d feel comfortable raising a child.
Maybe
you’re jumping to conclusions,
she told herself. Maybe you’re just being paranoid.
Just give it some time, and you’ll see that it’s not true.
It took her forever to fall asleep.
The next morning, her first order of
business was to find a private place to be sick. She carefully ducked outside, knowing that if
any of the rebels saw her, she’d be in for a stern lecture about security. Luckily, there was no one in sight.
RC promptly vomited into a pile of snow,
grateful that no one else could see her like this. The chilly morning breeze helped subdue the
nausea, and soon she was done. Just as
she was burying the evidence under the snow, she heard a familiar voice. “What are you doing out here?”
Alyx.
How could she avoid telling him the truth? It had been easier to simply avoid saying
anything. But actively lying to him
about it? She didn’t think she could go
that far.
She looked down, afraid to meet his
eye. “I’ve been feeling sick the last
couple of days, but I don’t have a temperature or anything like that. I think I might . . .”
Her voice trailed off, lost on the breeze that chilled her to the bone.
Alyx didn’t need her to finish the
sentence, though. He knelt down behind
her, and she felt some warmth again as his arms surrounded her. “How sure are you?”
“Not 100% sure. I haven’t talked to the medic yet, but it
seems like the most logical explanation.”
He sighed. “What are we going to do?”
That one sentence soothed her in a way
that little else could have. His word
choice spoke volumes. Instead of asking
what she was going to do like so many others might, Alyx used ‘we’. Without even thinking about it, he included
himself in the situation with her. She
wasn’t going to be alone in this. Tears
started to well up in her eyes, as if seeking to confirm her emotional
instability.
“I don’t know,” RC admitted. She shook her head, burying her face in her
hands. “I really don’t know.”
Alyx eventually helped her to her
feet. “It’s going to be all right,” he
whispered in her ear as they headed back inside. “I’ll do everything I can to make sure of
that.”
Later on in the day, RC gathered the
courage to talk to Harrison about her situation. As the medic, he was the only one who could
help her figure this out. “The symptoms
certainly fit,” he said solemnly after she told her story. “We’d have to get our hands on a pregnancy
test to be sure. Either that, or wait to
see how things go. If you are, I don’t
have the equipment here to provide proper prenatal care. The only place around here that does . . .” Harrison winced. “Well, let’s just say you’ve already rejected
that option by being on the run.”
RC nodded. “Yeah, and this is the reality I was trying
to avoid by running.” She settled back
against the wall, knowing that dwelling on this fact would do nothing to change
the situation she now faced. “Either
way, I will not hand myself over. I’m not going to let any child of mine be
subjected to that future. If you could
even call it a future.” And she meant
every word of it. Any child born in the
breeding facility had a 50% chance of being implanted with alien spores that
would turn them into future overlords, and a 50% chance of remaining human but
spending 14 years breeding continuously by force.
No.
She would never stand for that.
“I need to know for sure,” she
decided. “Can you get a hold of the test
for me?”
Harrison nodded. “We’re going on a pharmaceutical raid in a
couple of days. I should be able to snag
one for you. I’ll also be sure to grab
vitamins for you in case you need them.”
She managed a smile. “Thanks.
You won’t tell anyone, will you?”
“Gossip isn’t part of my job description,”
he assured her.
Thus began another waiting game. At least no one was in immediate danger this
time around, though this was just as life altering as anything RC had ever been
through. Aware that it was risky to say
too much (they were living in close quarters, after all), Alyx simply held her
hand whenever it seemed RC was having a difficult time dealing with it
all. She felt grateful for that.
The day finally came. Harrison was as good as his word. Immediately after returning from the trip, he
discreetly handed her the box.
Her body went numb. There was no doubt that the result of this
one little test would determine the course her life would take.
You always leave me wanting more! :)
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