Stephen Fry Discusses the Language of Nazi Germany

I just saw this short video about language and how it can be used to coerce people into committing horrible atrocities.  It's true that language is a powerful force, and while we should be free to speak, we should also remain aware of the power of the words we use.  The old saying that "words will never hurt me" is simply not true.

Also, I think Stephen Fry is a brilliant human being.  I just had to say that.

Blogspiration 2: Interconnectedness

I don't want to sound corny, but since I was a small child and learned that everyone and everything that we've ever known is composed of elements forged in the massive hearts of dying stars, I've always seen that kind of connection wherever I look.  Not only are we all made from the same kind of thing, that fact also connects birth and death in a fascinating way.


That's why this affected me so much when I saw it on Facebook.

Those networks of connections in the picture also remind me of the way we network socially.  Even when we don't fully understand the way we're attached to the others around us, the influence flows along that attachment all the same.

This also means we have a much greater responsibility than we know.  Our actions often have consequences we never would have anticipated.

A Sister's Perspective on Bullying

I've said it many times: words have power, especially in the age of social media where those words can spread like fire for the whole world to see.  Now, I'm limited in my capacity to say how hurtful those words can be.  You can only learn how painful it is to be tormented by your peers through hearing personal stories like this one.  Here in my home state of Iowa, 14 year old freshman Kenneth Weishuhn told his community that he was gay.  His friends turned against him, and about a month later on April 14, he committed suicide.

Here is what his older sister Kayla had to say about her brother.




Think before you speak. Consider the fact that the person you're tearing down is a real, flesh-and-blood human being. They have feelings, and they need to feel loved just like anyone else.  And sometimes, when someone is surrounded by rejection from all sides, the love they still get from their family isn't enough to combat the pain.

People may say they didn't intend for things to go this far, but that doesn't change the fact that they did.  There are far too many stories like this one.  There's no longer any room for the excuse "Well, I didn't know it could end this way."  If you've ever read or seen the news, you know.  And believe me, caving in to the pressure to fit in right now won't drown out the regret you may feel later for hurting someone, even if it doesn't go as far as suicide.

Just think before you actively harm someone this way.  Say what you will, but know what can happen and ask "Is it worth this?"

This story, as well as the countless others like it, must remind us of what can go wrong.

Bullies and the Beaten Down

I just want to say this much.  I HATE it when people bully others who are different from them.  Whether it's due to race, economic background, sexual orientation, personal interests, or a child's inability to relate easily with others, tormenting people needlessly is a despicable act.  Young children and even adults can become overwhelmed with the negativity thrust upon them, and some of these people resort to suicide.  It's a serious problem.


On the one hand, I think legislation aimed at this problem may be a good thing, but when it comes to 1st Amendment rights, things get a little bit tricky.  The last thing in the world I want is for us as a nation to lose our ability to express ourselves freely.  That is part of what defines us as a people.  If we overly restrict our speech in the realm of electronic media, as many say AZ House Bill 2549 would, we all ultimately lose.  The bill would make it unlawful to  use language intended to "terrify, intimidate, threaten, harass, annoy or offend."  Now, to be fair, the law does attempt to make it clear that the person issuing such speech must have intent to harass the target, and the target should have a reasonable fear for the safety of themselves or those close to them.  If you want to determine for yourself whether this is the case, here is one article that briefly addresses the concerns that have been raised.


Even so, is that enough?  Who judges?  We all know judgments can be flawed.  We're all human, and there are always those who will twist any situation to their benefit.  The democratic process is made possible by our freedom of speech.. We lose that, and we could lose everything else.


Legislation aimed at disarming bullies treads a thin line, and any line crossed to benefit one group can ultimately be turned against them as well.  If the 1st Amendment is violated, that impacts us all.  Such bills need to be very specific in their language and should undergo rigorous review before they are passed.  The public should have every opportunity to see such bills through their various stages of revision.  We are, after all, the ones who ultimately hold our legislators accountable for the work they do.


I believe schools have the right to regulate bullying through policies that address the unique situations of their district.  Students have a right to free speech, but the school should also remain free of tormenting behavior that adversely impacts the learning environment.  These policies are left to the school board and parents to decide.  We need to make it clear that harassment is not acceptable.  If people actively and consistently stand up for the bullied, we wouldn't need policy to begin with.  In our schools and in our towns, we can see the difference between off-handed comments or one time statements of opinion and bullying.  With laws, we leave the decision to someone who may not have seen all the facts.  In our lives, we will see the facts if we choose to look out for them.  When local policies cross a line or are clearly not doing enough to address a serious issue, then the government may step in, but in a limited capacity.


I know I've said this before, but what bullies need to understand is that hurtful words have a power they may not fully understand.  I have to believe that those who bullied people to the point of suicide didn't intend for things to go that far.  And for those bullies that genuinely hope to inflict real pain on others and enjoy it for their own sick benefit, the fruits of your actions will catch up to you.  And this is not a threat.  It is a statement of fact.  People will only tolerate the brutally hurtful for so long.  You have the right to say mean things to someone, of course, and that should remain the case.  However, that doesn't make what you're saying right.  You should know when you're crossing the line, you should understand there are consequences for that, and you should know what they are.  Before you say something, you should be willing to accept those consequences.  Words have staying power, especially in a world with the internet.  Don't claim ignorance when something you said is used against you.  This is a risk you take when you utilize your 1st Amendment rights.


Now, to briefly address another concern I've heard.  Some have said that bullying aimed at homosexual students in particular should not be regulated because it would infringe upon the religious liberties of those who believe homosexuality is wrong.  I must say this: there is a difference between expressing a deeply held belief in a civilized manner and being openly hateful to someone.  When you're harassing someone for something like sexual orientation, even when it does correspond with a deeply held belief, you can't convince me it isn't hateful to do so.  We need to learn to love people and be kind to one another, even when someone lives in a way that violates your own conscience.  Bullying them won't save them.  If anything, it will only make them feel more isolated and alone.  And in those instances, they may not even be able to turn to their own family.  Love and kindness should be the default position anyone takes.


So what do you do if you're bullied and feel like there's no way out?  First of all, you need to find someone you can talk to.  Even when there is no policy in place that can protect you, the best protection you can offer yourself is the support of others.  This can be family, friends, anyone who will listen.  And for those of you who can't find anyone you know to listen to you, you can turn to the online community.  Yes, cyber bullying is an epidemic problem with social media, but that same social media can be your ally is you know how to use it.  The story of a girl who used Reddit to stop cyber bullying shows how people can band together to stop this kind of behavior before someone gets hurt.  We can take our own power back. 


While I doubt anyone would want to talk to me, I want to make it clear that I am also willing to listen.  I've been bullied, so I understand the pain all too well.  It can wreak havoc on your self-esteem, but you don't need to be alone.  I'm putting this out there because I want to reach people with my point of view, and if I weren't willing to accept the consequences of that, I'd be a hypocrite.  Plus, I really do care.

Learning to Love

Given the heated rhetoric I've been hearing lately, I find it refreshing to read something that doesn't focus on trying to find someone to blame for the world's problems.  Thanks to the sharing abilities of Facebook, I was able to read from a blog post that said so many of the things that I've felt needed to be said.  And I won't lie, it can be construed as offensive to people of faith purely from the title I'm Christian, unless you're gay, but in order to really get at the message, you need to look past that.  The point the author makes is simple: if you're going to be a real Christian, or even just a decent human being, it is unacceptable to hate people just for being different than you are.  If we are to have a better world, we need to really learn how to love.

On the same blog, the author posted the contents of an email sent to him as a reaction to the blog post.  In it she reveals how she realized that her own son was gay and how she came to terms with the hateful things she used to say about gay people.  Sometimes people can go through amazing transformations when they're willing to keep an open mind and open heart.  If only people didn't need to be personally affected in this way to question the way they treat others.

I know, I sound like a hippie right now, or a promotional spiel on the Lifetime Movie Network.  That's not my intent.  I just want to be honest about how these pieces of writing touched me.  I have a lot of friends who have struggled with hate because of sexual orientation, religious preferences, and many other reasons.  There are 7 billion people on this planet, and none of us are exactly the same, but we all need love.  And expending the energy on hating others takes away from our precious time and energy that we could be dedicating to something else.

We all have a personal responsibility for the way we speak of and interact with others.  Before you say something cruel to or about someone you barely know, think about the impact your words may really have.  Even if you believe the way someone lives is sinful, is that enough reason to treat them as less than a human being?  If you were them, how would you want others to treat you?

Anyway, it's something to think about.

The Power of Words: Personal Responsibility

We’ve been hearing a lot about Rush Limbaugh and other personalities that have used defamatory and degrading language against women.  Bill Maher is an example from the other side of the political spectrum.  Thanks to the wonderful thing that is the 1^st amendment, we have the freedom to say things, but there are responsibilities that go along with the words we choose.  Words are powerful and have consequences, both intended and unintended.  We must accept those consequences, and we must think carefully about what we want to say.  I discussed this at length last week.

That being said, I’d like the present the other side of things.  As the person on the receiving end of harsh insults, we feel hurt and angry.  It’s all too easy to take insults to heart, especially if we hear them enough.  That’s why children who are bullied often experience low self-esteem.  You hear something said about you often enough, you start to believe it.

However, there comes a point when you need to take responsibility for who you are and how you feel about yourself.  Words injure, but only if we let them.  Half the power that words have comes from the person on the receiving end.  It makes no sense to yield all power to a bully by letting their word s damage you.  Try to be strong.  Stand up for yourself by refusing to believe what they say.  Show them that they’re wrong and that they won’t break you.

Half the time, the person tearing you down doesn’t really know you.  If they don’t know you, why should they play a role in defining you?

The Power of Words: The Rush Limbaugh Edition

Lately I’ve been angry about something, and it feels good to finally be getting it out there.  This has nothing to do with my writing, but it does deal with words and the power they hold.  I’m sure we’ve all heard by now how Rush Limbaugh spent three days on his radio show talking about Sandra Fluke and her testimony before Congress.  She made the point that the pill can potentially be expensive for someone in college, and that the pill is often used to treat a medical condition.  These things are true.  Are there cheap off brand versions available?  Yes, of course.  Then again, your doctor decides on your prescription, and some of the off brands don’t work for everyone.  If you’re one of these women, costs can add up.  That being said, should insurance companies be mandated to pay for these prescriptions in their entirety?  This is the question we should be focusing on.  Instead, this issue has turned into a mudslinging match of the worst kind.

Now, as a writer, I’m glad that we have freedom of speech.  It’s a wonderful thing, and every time I hear about people wanting to impose limitations on that freedom, I get very nervous.  If we lose that right, we may as well give up everything else as far as I’m concerned.  You can’t have real freedom if you can’t express yourself.  And when Rush Limbaugh made his comments about Sandra Fluke, calling her a “slut” and a “prostitute,” he was certainly exercising his right to free speech.  You’ll never catch me disputing that.  Does that make what he said right?  No.

Let me explain my position.  I never subscribed to the saying “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”  That’s complete crap.  Bullies say horrible things precisely because they hurt.  The best we can do is not let the mean-spirited words of others get under our skin, which is much easier said than done.  I know this all too well.  The bullying I endured as a kid helped shape me into the person I am today.

So I can say this with confidence.  Words are powerful.  They can persuade, inspire, create, and destroy.  “The pen is mightier than the sword.”  This is a saying I can get behind, except, of course, someone’s actually making fun of me from the corner of a room while someone’s impaling me with a sword.  That is one instance where I may be inclined to change my position on this.

Rush used the words he did because he knew they were laced with powerful meaning.  He knew they would get a reaction.  I’m sure he said what he did to be funny, and many people did find it funny.  I won’t dispute that either.  However, his choice of words angered many, including me, because it suggested a belief that many no longer find acceptable:  if a woman is sexually active, it’s okay to call her a slut.  It’s not, in my humble opinion.  He even suggested that he’d pay to give girls aspirin to put between their knees.   Yes, sex is something that should be handled with careful consideration, but let’s not pretend that having sex immediately invalidates her right to be treated with dignity and respect.   Women shouldn’t be denigrated over their sexual choices, especially if men won’t be. 

A definite misstep was his calculation of how much sex Sandra must have been having to spend $3000 in three years of school.  First of all, she said it could cost that much, not that it did for her personally.  Second, we’re talking about the birth control pill. I never thought I’d have to take the time to say this, but you take one pill a day.  The cost is the same no matter how many times you have sex over that three year period.  While reading the comments sections of articles dealing with this issue, I was stunned by how many people didn’t seem to know this.  Third, he said that the taxpayers would be her pimps for paying her to have sex.  Tax dollars wouldn’t cover the cost of contraception.  Insurance companies would.  If anything, insurance premiums would go up, and I've even heard just as many people saying that they'd actually go down due to the decrease in unwanted pregnancies.  I don’t know how it would all work because I’m not an expert at these things, nor am I a fortune teller.  However, if we’re going to have the conversation, I’d at least like to get it right about what's actually at stake.

What Limbaugh did in using this language, besides hurting Fluke’s feelings, is distract us from the issue at hand.  There are a lot of valid questions to be asked, but they’re not really being asked or answered because of the controversy that sprung forth from this.  In an article entitled “Pills For Sluts?: Sixquestions for Rush Limbaugh about sex,promiscuity, and contraception,” William Saletan talks about some of the questions Limbaugh has raised, whether advertently or inadvertently, and should discuss.

1.What’s the problem with contraceptive insurance: socialism or promiscuity?

2. How much sex is too much? 

3. Is contraception a sex enabler?

4. What consequences should a woman face for having sex?

5. Is pregnancy prevention a legitimate medical need?

6. What responsibility should men bear?

These are good questions, and I recommend you read his article to hear what he has to say about them.  There is also, of course, the question that brought this about in the first place.  Does requiring religious institutions to provide insurance coverage that includes contraception infringe on religious liberty.

I’m all for having a good, honest debate about these issues, and I want to know people’s thoughts on these questions.  However, the way that Rush handled it in no way promoted civil discourse.  Of course, that wasn’t his intention.  He’s an entertainer, and as such, we have to expect this from him.  However, he also bears a responsibility in choosing his words.  People turn to him for information as well, so while he’ll undoubtedly put his spin on it according to his personal opinion, as he is free to do, responsibility also indicates he should at least be factual in the information he provides.  He’s doing more than entertaining, after all.

Now, do I believe he should be fired for what he said?  No.  His words may have been irresponsible, or merely poorly chosen, but he is free to say these things whether we like it or not.  That’s the beauty of America.  At the same time, he is representing his employer, so they are free to fire him if they want to.  Just as his advertisers are free to keep walking away if they want.  The advertisers who have walked away understand the power of his words as well as anyone, and they don’t want the beliefs reflected in those words to cast a bad light on them.  Rush and other people like him have to be prepared for this kind of reaction, because that’s the responsibility that comes along with his word choices.

Now, he’s since apologized for his words.  Is he sincere?  Or is he bowing to the pressure?  The fact that he went on a three day long rant before backing down suggests an answer, but who knows?  He may actually mean it.  As an entertainer, he pushes the envelope further because he needs to hold an audience.  Sincere or not, he still has to live with the consequences of what he said.

I only hope this mess settles down so we can answer the important questions that have been raised.  We need debate.  We need solutions.  As much fun as it’s been arguing over whether Rush went to far, let’s focus now on what actually matters.

Racism and Language

Given that today is a day to celebrate the legacy of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and all that he worked for, I decided to spend some time reflecting on racism, and racist language specifically.  As human beings, we often fear that which is different from us, even when those differences are only skin deep.  Granted, there are always going to be cultural differences between races, often stemming from socioeconomic factors that are influenced by racism in society, but today we must remember that we are all human beings.  As members of the human race, we have more in common biologically than not, and we can no longer afford the delusion that one group of humans are superior to another.  It’s too dangerous, too divisive.

Now, that being said, one tool used by people who wish to perpetuate racism is language.  We’ve all heard racial slurs, some of which are so pervasive in our culture that I hardly need to list them here.  Now, those words have the power to inflict damage on those for whom they are intended for one important reason.  As a society, we agree that they have power.  Our belief in their power to wound is precisely what gives them that ability.  Don’t get me wrong.  I’m not trying to diminish the pain inflicted by saying this.  As a child who was frequently bullied, I know how much words can hurt.  I merely think it’s an important point to understand.  If we do, and someone tries to diminish us by slinging hurtful words at us, we can take the power back by refusing to let those words hinder or define us.  Easier said than done, I know, but it’s a step.

However, much of the burden should also fall upon the aggressors.  People can feel the intention behind words.  When an aggressor says a hurtful word with undisguised hurt, it can be terribly difficult to shake that off.  I don’t want people who hurl racial slurs, or other types of hurtful words, to use the excuse “It’s their fault, they’re the ones who chose to be hurt by what I said.”  Yes, we give permission to others to hurt us, but that should not be taken as license to say whatever you want whenever you want to say it.  In America we have freedom of speech, and believe me, I’m forever grateful for that.  However, freedom does not mean freedom from responsibility.  Words have great transformative power, and as such, we have a responsibility for the impact of our words.  When we speak, we should speak carefully.  We should keep the well-being of others in mind.  Civility is the key to making life better for all of us.

Racist language is a problem for everyone, because whether you use it or not, it’s a part of your world.  If you’re not actively fighting to change it and the impact it has, you’re allowing it to continue through passive acceptance.  That doesn’t make you bad, but it does make you responsible.

Thoughts on Politics and the Power of Words

As I sit here, tracking the results of the New Hampshire Republican primary, I can’t help but meditate on the power of words.  I live in Iowa as well, so the caucuses of a week ago are also fresh in my mind.  As a registered Independent and obstinate person who cannot agree enough with either side to affiliate myself entirely with one or the other, I find myself in a great position.  I don't have worry about the pressure to adopt the rhetoric of any party.  I have the freedom to pick and choose.  However, I won’t claim to be immune to the rhetoric flying around.  Let’s face it, even the most intelligent, savvy people find themselves susceptible to it from time to time. 

The speeches, constructed from carefully selected, emotionally charged words, are a crucial part of one of the longest, most expensive, and grueling job application processes in the world.  Yes, we can look at a candidate’s prior record to get an idea of who they are and what they believe in, but let’s be honest.  While many politically active people care enough to put in the time and energy to conduct this kind of research, most citizens make their decision based solely upon a candidate’s performance in a debate or a speech that they found particularly moving.  Words can be crafted to paint any facts in a new light, or to obscure inconvenient, potentially damaging, truths.  That is the nature of politics, and whether we like it or not, language itself can be very political at times.

I say this because I have strong feelings about the state of politics these days.  What can I say?  The division in this country seems to be larger than ever, and I find myself inexorably trapped in the middle of two diametrically opposed sides.  As the two drift further away from one another, driven by animosity and fervent belief in party dogma, we see that division portrayed through bitter words.  Issues, framed through carefully coined terms such as “pro life” vs. “pro choice,” illustrate with clarity what each side believes is at stake.  And as political attitudes evolve, we can see how the evolution of the rhetoric has directed it.  After all, in a nation where people are looking for a way out of economic difficulty, we’re seeing the word “moderate” devolve into a nasty word, at least as far as the GOP is concerned.  Even putting  my own political beliefs aside, I can’t help but find this fascinating, and terrifying, at the same time.  Words can be a wonderful beacon of civilization.  They can be art.  They are capable of portraying, and perpetrating, the best and worst that humanity has ever known.  It’s all in the hands and motivations of those who wield those words.

As a writer, I can’t deny that I live in awe of that power, and I hope that I can do well with it.  I want to live up to the responsibility that comes along with language.  And I also hope that people read, and watch, the world around them with a critical eye.  Sometimes you should allow language to move you, because being swept away by beautiful words can be a wonderful thing.  Yet, in the public arena, we need to be careful, because that kind of unquestioning submission can be extremely dangerous.